Impending violence

I am a grown man and I my biggest fear at the moment is that some mouth-breather is going to spoil the ending of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows for me. I should be ashamed, right?

I remember when HP and the Half-Blood Prince came out; there were reports of spiteful dipshits yelling at the people waiting in line to buy the book, "Dembledore dies!" (Sorry to anyone who hasn't gotten around to reading book six yet.) Here in Salem, there was a guy driving around town with a big sign on his car proclaiming the shock ending.

The charitable part of me wonders what awful things must have happened to people like that to turn them into such douche bags killjoys. And I worry about my reaction should I meet one of them. This Friday will be the first of the midnight releases that I go to and, if someone shouts out or otherwise reveals any of the resolutions to the myriad loose ends, I think I might be capable of violence. I might just grab a fake wand from the nearest 12-year-old and shove it somewhere life-threatening.

Will they allow me to have my copy of Harry Potter in the pokey?

Ugh... There are any number of things I should be writing, or at least thinking about writing, and still I spend my time worrying about Harry Potter. What is it that is wrong with me? This is meant as an introduction, by the way. Hello.